19 Comments

The first one feels like an epic Homer-esque ballad. Love it.

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Gorgeous. I'm with Elizabeth on this one!

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I'm with both of you

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Thanks so much, Chen--makes me very happy! :)

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Thanks a million, Margaret! :)

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Ooh that's a big compliment! Thanks so much, Elizabeth!

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and I love the haiku

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So glad you do, dear Chen--on most nights the moon is a good deal more helpful than that porch light anyway! ;-)

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Nice villanelle; love the way shifted the refrain line punctuation to provide enjambment! Nicely done!

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Thanks so much--very glad you like it! I was so glad to finally write a villanelle with fuller use of enjambment.

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I think it was artfully done.

I was discussing the form with someone here on Substack (it turns out there's more fans of villanelles here than I thought!) and I remarked it seems to me there are two kinds of villanelle; one where the refrain forms a chorus of the main theme and tone, and one where the refrain subtly changes with each repetition (Plath's "Mad Girl's Love Song" is a great example). The latter is much harder to do. You did it very well!

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Yes, I've been very pleasantly surprised at the enthusiasm for villanelles here. Thanks for introducing me to Plath's poem: it was one I wasn't familiar with, and, yes, another fantastic handling of the form.

As a purely personal standard, I typically use a lot of enjambment, so I knew that I was getting closer to being comfortable with the form if I could work through and past the lines...

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Yes, enjambment’s a really necessary technique to master, especially when writing metered verse. But what you did…shifting the punctuation to create enjambment in the repeated lines…that was next level!😁

That’s something I’m going to put in my toolkit!

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Such a craftswoman. Who are "the three" in this?

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Thank you, Wes! The three Fates of the Greeks were Clotho, who spun the thread, Lachesis, who measured the thread, and Atropos, who cut it off. Hence my lines about the spindle and the shears. Being a handspinner myself, perhaps my fascination with this bit of mythology is that much stronger! ;-)

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I remembef Arachnea as a spinner as well.

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Ah yes, Arachnea, whose spinning did not turn out quite so well!

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Solid villanelle. Picking the right two repeating lines is critical of course, and I love the two you've chosen! I read the intro lines and thought "oh yeah this is gonna be good, wonder where she's gonna take those." Was not at all disappointed! Thanks so much for sharing!

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Wow, thanks so much! I've been stumbling through the form more frequently and loving it more as I grasp the possibilities.

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